DDH Hopteron DDH Hazy IPA The Mill Hopteron, it’s cawed, but what that means ah’ve git nae fuckin clue. This’n was me last can – it was time tae get clean, an ah had me list. Jist this, a cheeky stoot, an a few muir IPAs, wan or twa pales an then some ae thoseContinue reading “Trains-hopping”

The Odyssour

Imperial Mango Compass Sour Braeside Brewing Sing to me of the can, Muse, the can of mangoes and tartness Driven time and again into my mouth, once plundered from the hallowed heights of the fridge. Many adjuncts did it contain and learned their uses, many flavours it blended, in the open glass, fighting for deliciousnessContinue reading “The Odyssour”

The Kaiju

Betlegeuse Double Red Ale Kaiju Once upon an arvo sunny, while I tried to stretch the money, That I’d received from my redundancy some several months before– In the park I sat, while sipping, on a beer I’d kept from ripping, Till I had a glass for tipping, tipping from the can to pour. “TisContinue reading “The Kaiju”

The Faraway Beer, Chapter 27 – The Land of Drink-What-You-Please

Lemon Meringue PiePA Lemon Oat Cream IPA 2 Birds                 They looked around, perplexed, until Dick proclaimed loudly “I say! Where on earth are we?” A strange little man in brightly coloured clothes, who happened to be passing said “No-where!”                 “Now hang about” said Dick. “How can we be no-where?”                 “You aren’t nowhere”Continue reading “The Faraway Beer, Chapter 27 – The Land of Drink-What-You-Please”

Moby Dank

Danker Things Hazy IPA Fixation                 Call me later. Some days ago – never mind how long precisely – having little or no beer in my fridge, and nothing in particular to interest me at the local Liquorland, I thought I would wander about a little and see the part of the world that wasContinue reading “Moby Dank”

Harmonious Reflection of Booze on Kitchen Table on a Spring Evening

The Agent IPA Co-Conspirators Brewing This collection of haiku from an anonymous author is commonly attributed to Bashō during his Ipa period, when a plague caused the cessation of commerce and entertainment, and the usual operations of urban life. For his inspiration as an artist he was forced to look inwards, shunning the glittering socialContinue reading “Harmonious Reflection of Booze on Kitchen Table on a Spring Evening”

The Malty Falcon

Cherrywood Smoked Rye Baltic Porter Dainton Brewery The can was pretty, and it knew it, too. Royal metallic blue on matte royal blue, the colour of her eyes, all covered in a tessellating pattern of crosses. Double crosses. This beer was gonna be rich, I thought. And it was. I knew this one would beContinue reading “The Malty Falcon”

How the 4 Pines Got its Pavlova – a Just So Story

Keller Door Nitro Pavlova Ale 4 Pines Once upon a time, O Best Beloved, there was a rather plain beer. It tasted as beers usually do – it was cold and gold, it had hops in drops, some fizz in his biz and was malty, but faulty.                 One day it looked about it atContinue reading “How the 4 Pines Got its Pavlova – a Just So Story”

On A Tale of Two Tinnies

A Note From his Editor to Mr Charles Dickens, Esq. Mr Dickens, Thank you for your submission to our serial. Please find enclosed a brief critique of the first line (!) of your new work. Please note that this has inspired us to rethink our policy of paying our contributors by the word. Brevity, theyContinue reading “On A Tale of Two Tinnies”

Beer and Loathing

Solitary Bliss West Coast IIPA The Mill Brewery We were somewhere around Brunswick on the edge of the lockdown as the beers began to take hold. I remember saying something like “I feel a bit parched, maybe we should have a drink…” And suddenly, there was a terrible roar all around us as the windsContinue reading “Beer and Loathing”